Satire: Former DL Concerned About Joseph Smith’s Ability to Translate

“El Niño” is Spanish for “The Niño,” of course


by Steve, former DL

I used to be just like those LDS types – I allowed the culture of the church to blind me into feeling guilty for my self-destructive behaviors and I even served as a DL in an English-speaking mission.

Of course, we were supposed to be studying the Book of Mormon, but since I had already watched the cartoons, I needed something more stimulating than just “reading the book.”

That’s when I found a bunch of material produced by Bellevue Baptist Church that really opened my eyes to Joseph Smith. Like, did you know he used stones to translate? So even though my companion was like, “yeah, Joseph Smith was pretty open about it…it’s in the introduction to the Book of Mormon,” I knew right away the Church was trying to hide things from me.

Plus, how could he have translated from a language without taking classes or having a dictionary or something… I mean, that’s how I learned that “El niño” is Spanish for “The niño.” Anyway, you definitely have to have a class or a book.

My idiot companion was all like, “weren’t you just talking about seer stones? Isn’t that a perfect example of how translation could work without classes or dictionaries?,” I know he’s just a stuck-up Pharisee. Plus, he’s just an English-speaking missionary, so what would he know?


Brett Jensen manages The Ward Preacher. You can follow him on Twitter @wardpreacher.

1 thought on “Satire: Former DL Concerned About Joseph Smith’s Ability to Translate

  1. The saddest thing about this post is that the dialogue isn’t that far off from what actual people say in this actual real life.

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